One of my favorite expressions is “It’s not the load that breaks you, it’s how you carry it.” Well this week the load broke me. On one hand, I’m criticizing myself for not carrying it better, stronger. On the other hand, it’s been bad. And sometimes you can’t be that strong the whole time.

As for running, I didn’t run the entire week. No big deal. Not like I have a marathon in 2 weeks or anything. If any part of marathon success comes from positive thinking, I’m fucked.

In the upcoming weeks I’m hoping to come up with some sort of compensatory mental strategy to get me through all 26 miles. Off the top of my head I’m thinking: slow-and-steady-really-long-run-that-ends-with-a-nice-medal. But right now I don’t care about any of it. Even after watching the Chicago Marathon this morning, I wasn’t personally inspired. I’m too beat down from this past week and the prospect of this upcoming week.

Hoping to dig deep tonight to do another late night long run. Seriously dig deep. I’m so not up for this run. Tired and drained. Thank goodness for random stupid television! I would talk about what I watch while running on the treadmill but it would be too embarrassing. 🙂 But hopefully if there are some distracting shows to watch I can get through it. Let the mind games begin! (4 miles + 30 minutes + 3 miles + 60 minutes = 16 mile run…. orrrr not)

UPDATE: Looked my run calendar after I wrote this and turns out I ran 4 miles on Tuesday. That just seems a million years ago.

uh oh! my care bear care-o-meter is almost in the red!