What kind of moron goes on an island hopping fun run when there is a MAJOR school project due? —> This guy!!
What can I say? I guess I lost my mind yesterday. It was a rough day and I needed… something. And I thought… I should run. Because running saves!
So I took off. And it was a great run. I did not expect that. I’ve gotten so that I equate great runs with my totally controlled environment of treadmill running, so much so that I’ve started to freak out when I go outside anymore. — What about alligators?! Does 6pm qualify as dusk/feeding time?? Will these shorts be ok? I’m too fat for Oiselle’s stride shorts! These won’t work and I’ll regret it 1 mile in! Will this belt hold my iPhone? Great, I’m going to have to hold this over all 7 miles! Will I make before sunset?? Seriously I remember something about alligators and sunset – what was it??!! — Those sort of fears.
But if there’s something I hate it’s when I’m being weak, mentally. So my response to all the fears was “Don’t care. Don’t care. Don’t care. Don’t care….” There was also a lot of “Just go! Just go! Just go! Stop thinking! Stop thinking!” And, as usual, my mind is 5000x worse than any run will ever be! No alligators. Belt was fine. Phone was fine. Shorts were fine! My pace was more than fine! I frickin killed it! What the heck?! When did I get this fast?! Fast for me, which is NOT fast, but I’m talking a solid 1-2 min per mile faster than I used to be.
And the weather! Is this south Florida or Antarctica?!! I was positive it was in the 70’s, it felt that cool outside. At one point my hamstring started twitching (damnit probably not taking in enough salt after all, whoops!) and I thought, should I stop early? I’m really conservative with any twitch or pain so I don’t get injured before the race. But I thought, no way, there is NO WAY I will quit this run when it’s the first cold weather we’ve had in months!! When I finished, I looked at my weather app and it said “86 degrees, feels like 93.” Feels like 93 to who?!? Canadians?? Because it feels cold to me! Ok ok I’ll buy the 86. Because when it gets to lower than 75 I need to wear long sleeves and tights.
And the point of this post is that:
- I am not going to get any sleep this Thursday night because I have a project due on Friday (it’s technically Friday as I write this) and because I opted for an island-hopping tempo run when I should have been doing my work. And…
- This is a perfect example of why I do not tell anyone from school about my blog, because the last thing I need is any teacher’s aide or classmate or even the professor knowing that my work is a result of last minute cramming and prioritizing running over my projects!*
To all of you who are struggling, mentally, with getting out there for your runs or with giving a damn about your runs, stay strong! Yes, sometimes everything just sucks and that stupid “no excuses, just do it!” tagline is complete bs. Sometimes you really just don’t have it. But other times… if you have even a glint of “maybe” somewhere in you, hold on tight to it and it might take you on a great run!
*really this just happened this one time though! Normally I’m a slave to my school work and would never put running first! But come on this is the last week before taper and I have to make it count! Why couldn’t I have that professor who’s a runner again this semester?!